David Bowie

Thin White Duke

bowie-smoking Slept with Mick Jagger, for reasons we cannot fathom. We know this because Angela caught them in bed together. It's not gross that he slept with another man, it's gross because he slept with Mick.

"You don't know what you're missing. I'm a pop star! I have a big cock!"


8 Jan 1947 David Robert Jones born, 40 Stansfield Road, Brixton, London.
1961 A fistfight with George Underwood leaves Bowie with very little sight in his left eye. Part of the pupil had to be surgically removed. This also makes Bowie's eyes appear to be different colors.
1966 Changes stage name to David Bowie.
1969 Space Oddity.
20 Mar 1970 Marries Mary Angela Barnett. According to Bowie, they met when they were both "fucking the same bloke" (Asian record executive Calvin Mark Lee.)
30 May 1971 Son, Duncan Zowie Heywood Bowie (Zowie Bowie), born.
Jan 1972 In an interview with Melody Maker, Bowie states that he is gay.
1972 The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars.
Aug 1972 "If [ Elvis Presley's ] image wasn't bisexual then I don't know what. I think Jagger's image was also very bisexual. People talk about 'fag-rock' but that's an unwieldy title at the best of times. I think it's all rock 'n roll. It's the audiences that are fags if anything." Interview with Steve Turner, Beat Instrumental.
Sep 1973 A stalker breaks into David and Angela's apartment, and requests to kiss David's foot. Police are summoned.
1976 "I'm pretty much over my affection for me. The only time I get halfway wistful for those old days is in Japan. All those little boys are so cute, I just want to take them all up to my room."
Jan 1978 Angie Bowie attempts suicide.
8 Feb 1980 Divorces Angie.
1980 Stars in a Broadway play, The Elephant Man.
1981 Under Pressure with Queen. Riff later stolen by Vanilla Ice.
1985 A brother, Terry, commits suicide.
1988 Appears as Pontius Pilate in The Last Temptation of Christ.
24 Apr 1992 Marries exotic Somali model Iman Abdulmajid.
1996 Appears as Andy Warhol in Basquiat.
1997 Estimated net worth $919M, though this is almost certainly overstated.
1997 Issues a bond on the basis of his back catalog, raising $55M.
15 Aug 2000 Daughter, Alexandrina Zahra Jones, born.

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